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Let’s pile on the bad news. Not only has the toilet clogged but it’s the only toilet in your apartment; you don’t have one of these toilet plungers; you don’t have a toilet auger and your new boss is due to arrive at your house in 10 minutes.
Before you panic, it’s worth noting that most “soft” clogs will resolve on their own. Soft clogs are generally the result of too much toilet paper being flushed down the toilet trap and getting stuck. Hard clogs are a different matter entirely, but for the sake of this article we’re assuming the problem is a soft one.
As you don’t have time to see if it will clear on its own, it’s time to head to the kitchen and get a bucket full of hot water and some detergent. (Some people swear by coke, but I’ve tested it, and don’t see any point in using it instead of hot water). You don’t want the water to be at boiling point as you’ll run the risk of damaging the porcelain of your toilet bowl. You just want it nice and hot.
If you bowl is full to the brim, unfortunately there is not much you can do until some of the water has seeped away. But if there is space (and there usually is) add the hot water and let it sit for a few seconds. As you don’t have that much time on your hands, squirt in some dishwashing detergent (ideally of an eco-friendly variety).
The hot water combined with the lubricating effect of the detergent should help breakdown and dislodge the blockage – giving you that encouraging sucking sound of a toilet unblocking itself. The detergent is more dense than plain water so will sink to the lowest spot in your trapway, freeing things up as it does so.
Don’t bother trying to stick a wire down the trap. You won’t get far enough round the bend to do anything significant to the blockage. Also you may end up scratching the toilet.
Good luck! Ding Ding.. Is that the doorbell?